michaelboy (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
michaelboy) wrote2025-07-23 02:22 pm
michaelboy) wrote2025-07-23 02:22 pm
Buuff
She passed away this morning on the way to the vets.
Loved her so much. So fortunate.
She passed away this morning on the way to the vets.
Loved her so much. So fortunate.
michaelboy (michaelboy) wrote2025-07-20 08:22 pm
michaelboy) wrote2025-07-20 08:22 pmThe Switch from Sails to Steam*
I was 46 when Marie passed away in 2003 and now I'm creeping up razor close to 70. The time leading into my forties seemed forever expansive and extensive. Now, in an eye-blink, I'm what most consider elderly. What the heck happened?
I had a 40 year career as a mining engineer and IT manager which readily paid the bills, and allowed me to save some as well. Now I'm a $13/hr marina employee, hospice volunteer, hospital ER volunteer, and litter picker-upper. The former means little to me now, other than it gave me a basis to do more of what I love.
The great discovery was coming to the realization that the thing that truly satisfies and rewards is finding different ways to help and striving to be kind to others. It just took a damn long time to figure it out -- and now I have just a very limited time to do so.
Find a way to serve someone because of, you know..time. Hopefully when we are gone, a newer life might be inspired to do the same for others. One of the most precious things to remember about a person was their capacity, willingness and action to be kind. It lasts beyond lifetimes.
It's all good.
*Originally a Jimmy Buffet song, but Dave Mathews, Jack Johnson and Tim Reynolds perform a cover version of "A Pirate looks at Forty" that is an interesting testament to missed opportunities and aging.
I had a 40 year career as a mining engineer and IT manager which readily paid the bills, and allowed me to save some as well. Now I'm a $13/hr marina employee, hospice volunteer, hospital ER volunteer, and litter picker-upper. The former means little to me now, other than it gave me a basis to do more of what I love.
The great discovery was coming to the realization that the thing that truly satisfies and rewards is finding different ways to help and striving to be kind to others. It just took a damn long time to figure it out -- and now I have just a very limited time to do so.
Find a way to serve someone because of, you know..time. Hopefully when we are gone, a newer life might be inspired to do the same for others. One of the most precious things to remember about a person was their capacity, willingness and action to be kind. It lasts beyond lifetimes.
It's all good.
*Originally a Jimmy Buffet song, but Dave Mathews, Jack Johnson and Tim Reynolds perform a cover version of "A Pirate looks at Forty" that is an interesting testament to missed opportunities and aging.
michaelboy (michaelboy) wrote2025-07-13 09:35 pm
michaelboy) wrote2025-07-13 09:35 pmHalf a Dollar Ago
Years ago, I put 50 cents in the machine, pulled the handle and with a boom at the bottom of a sheet metal tray out came a fresh pack of Marlboro cigarettes.
It felt good, but then so did the hope to find someone who found my young self, desirous - someone who would want to lustfully tangle their arms around me.
It's been a very long time, since I smoked a cigarette.
michaelboy (michaelboy) wrote2025-07-13 08:34 pm
michaelboy) wrote2025-07-13 08:34 pmAdding, in the quieting
If I could run everything backwards
adding up each upside-down page
it wouldn't be the unfolding of my life
and never the same or nearly as good.
So it isn't really the summing of the parts
or even every bad thing ever unleashed
but is purely the direction we are carried.
If I looked for parts of you that were imperfect
and made careful castings of your heart
for all the hungry shoppers with blue light eyes
I would blind myself to hurt you deeply with it
And, If I never allowed hurt to be without anger
(or even with no apparent sign of reason)
I'd simply be an angry person.